Well, autumn is almost over, and winter is on the way. Whether you realize it or not, we have just passed the number one holiday of the year for girls like us; Halloween, and we are fast approaching the second most important day of the year. "Does she mean Thanksgiving; Christmas?" No cats, and kittens, it's neither of those. "Could she mean the winter solstice?" Nope, that's not it either. "She probably means New Year's Eve. Yeah, that's it!" Sorry, wrong again.

Do you give up? I am of course, referring to that most hallowed day for all shoppers (this is a shopping column you know). The day when it's almost a national decree that you spend every waking hour at the mall. The day, where we separate the casual browsers, the "window shoppers" from the true go for the jugular, "get your hands off that sweater I saw it first!" blood thirsty, no holds barred mall maniacs. "Ahhh, of course, she means Black Friday!" Now you've got it!

Black Friday is my favorite shopping day of the year. It should be yours too! When else do the stores open at 6 a.m. with door busting sales everywhere you look? When else can you find kind, gentle grandmothers scratching each other's eyes out over the hottest new toy? When else is it so totally easy to pass while shopping en femme? No one is going to pay any attention to you in your 4" heels and false eyelashes, (don't ever dress like that to go shopping by the way; we'll cover that another time). Everyone is too busy rubbing the sleep out of their eyes, and clawing through the sale tables for that perfect gift for Uncle Ted or Aunt Sally. It's the perfect environment for our sort of shopping adventure. So, rise early, preferably before 4 a.m. Get yourself all dolled up. Hop in the car, and motor on down to the mall. Arrive early, and shop late!

Now, I know what some of you are thinking. "She's out of her mind. There's no way I'm going to go marching off to the mall on the absolute busiest day of the year." "The three mile walk to the store from the outer reaches of the parking lot in those 4" heels she told me not to wear will cripple me for life!" Well, you might have a point. There is the serious risk of terminal blisters to be considered. To say nothing of the increased possibility of nail breakage while you fight over that cute little Liz Claiborne sweater they've got marked down to 75% off. If you are thinking these thoughts, then I've got something for you. I like to call it "The Badge of Shopping Shame". You call yourself a shopper? Puhleeeze! If you can't take the heat, get out of the layaway line honey.

OK, maybe I am being a bit too harsh here. After all, it is the new millennium. Perhaps it's time to consider an alternative to the in your face exhilaration of the sales rack frenzy. If it all sounds just too much for you, I've got another suggestion for you. Why not spend Black Friday shopping over the Internet? You can still get all dolled up. You'll still have no trouble passing since nobody's going to actually see you. Best of all, you can go change outfits three or four times during the course of your shopping adventure. You could even place a mirror strategically on your computer stand. That way you will always be able to see what you look like while you shop.

All right, are you ready? Makeup just so? Mirror in place? Let's go! Here are a few of my favorite sites for shopping on the net.

First of all, I don't know about you, but I'm a "gownaholic". I love evening gowns and the chance to wear them. I've shopped for them in a lot of places, brick & mortar and virtual. My favorite link for gowns right now is www.dresses.com . This site is easy to navigate, and the dresses are to die for! I've ordered two dresses from this company. The first "Shooting Stars" I kept. The second was called "Web of Intrigue", and I decided to send it back. It was gorgeous, but my bank account just couldn't handle two gowns in one season. They were very gracious about handling the return. I received personal communications; a real person's name was at the bottom of the confirmation e-mail. Their prices are not the lowest I've seen, but certainly not out of reason for the quality of the merchandise. Even if you don't buy, the visit is worth your time just to see the styles.

This next site, www.bigbra.com , is a little more on the bare bones level. There is no fancy navigation or applets running here. There really isn't even much information on it. What I can tell you is that it's run by a sweetheart of a lady named Suzanne whom I had the pleasure of meeting at the Southern Comfort Conference in September. She has a line of corsets that is absolutely gorgeous. She will custom fit your garment and has a dazzling array of fabrics to choose from. Everything from a basic patterned tricot to sumptuous velvets and tapestry prints. My personal fabric favorite was called "Lorinda", a rich velvet pattern with deep greens and reds. If you like the feel of serious support, these garments should interest you.

If it's makeup, fragrances or tools you're looking for I've got two choices for you to try. First, check out www.sephora.com . I've shopped the Times Square brick & mortar location of this one stop makeup heaven, and I can tell you, they've got everything. Even better, they're open until midnight! Their website is an adventure too. If you're looking for an exotic gift, try the "Jean Paul Gaultier" fragrance. It has a unique floral oriental scent, and comes in a femininely shaped bottle with its own little corset.

If you don't find what you're looking for at Sephora, then head on over to MAC Cosmetics at www.maccosmetics.com . Yes, the most t-friendly cosmetic store around finally has a great web presence. RuPaul is all over it and so are the great products this company produces. I can't live without their "Full Coverage" foundation. Set with powder it gives a long lasting flawless base for your makeup artistry.

Well that should get you started on your virtual shopping tour. Remember, when shopping over the web; always look for the secure sites to purchase from. Most will have a security statement available for you to view online. Check it out along with the companies return policies before making any purchase.

TIP OF THE MONTH:

Relax! When you go to the mall or local shop, whether you are all dolled up or in drab, relax, take your time. Nothing puts a sales clerk or fellow shopper on the defensive more than someone breaking a nervous sweat over a purchase does. Try to calm yourself before entering the store. Take deep breaths, and think happy thoughts. You'll get more enjoyment from the experience, and so will those around you. A pleasant smile goes a long way when interacting with others in a shopping situation.

Next month, I'll have some gift ideas for you, and maybe an adventure story or two. Remember, I'd love to hear from you. Send me your shopping stories. Send me pictures of you shopping online. I'd love to see them and maybe even put them in the column. Have fun with it!